


i'm you

by hanzios



Category: Hannibal (TV), Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Twins, Brotherly Love, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Fluff, Gen, Light Angst, Sibling Bonding, rafa & freddie are brothers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:14:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22235398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hanzios/pseuds/hanzios
Summary: The one where twin brothers Rafael & Frederick are at university.
Relationships: Dr. Frederick Chilton/Original Character(s), Dr. Frederick Chilton/Original Male Character(s), Rafael Barba/Dr. Frederick Chilton
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	i'm you

**Author's Note:**

> i really love crossovers, so i thought might as well write one where frederick chilton & rafael barba are twin brothers! i hope you enjoy this. 😌

It was one o’clock in the middle of the night, a Friday in December, when Rafael heard someone knocking on his door. 

  
He was knee-deep in studying a case for the following week’s classes, papers with yellow highlighters scattered all over his bed. Rafael was on one corner, legs crossed close to his body so there would be more space for his hand-outs. He picked up the cup of lukewarm coffee from the windowsill, not breaking eye-contact with the paper in his hand. He didn’t even get to take a sip when the knock came. 

  
Rafael considered not answering. 

  
He was busy, after all. He didn’t have time for anyone – whoever the hell it was – right now.

  
So, he remained quiet. It was probably one of the building’s tenants, asking for some salt or a spatula or whatever. It’s happened before; more than once, actually. Rafael wasn’t a charity case. He could barely afford housing outside the Harvard campus, he can’t bear losing ingredients again. 

  
Another knock. 

  
Rafael rolled his eyes. Maybe it was Mrs. Irvine, the sweet old lady from across the hall. Maybe she needed help with something and he was being an asshole.

  
His brother was right; Rafael was always the soft one. 

  
He climbed out of his bed carefully, trying not to crumple any of his papers or disturb the way they were positioned on his white sheets. When he reached the door, he considered not answering yet again. 

  
But then he heard a familiar voice, “Rafi, please open this door.”

  
Rafael’s eyes widened. He unlocked the locks and the barrel bolt, then swung open the door to reveal his twin brother standing on his hallway. It was like looking at a mirror. 

  
Frederick had Rafael’s face, his eyes, his lips. Only he’d grown his brown hair a little longer, and even tried forming a beard on his chin. There were patches of hair on his face, but to Rafael, he still looked prepubescent, like they were still fifteen-year-old boys from the Bronx. He was dressed in a crumpled button-up, tie hanging loosely over his neck. Rafael sniffed the air; he smelled a little like alcohol.

“What – What exactly are you doing here?” 

“Aren’t you going to invite me in?” his twin brother pressed, voice low. 

  
“You ignore me for five months and you think you can just invite yourself in my apartment at one in the morning?” Rafael sneered, the annoyance he’d been feeling for his brother for months bubbling to the surface. His campus was only an hour away, but whenever Rafael tried to reach out, Frederick would never visit or even return his calls. 

  
He squirmed, rubbing his arm. “I just…” Rafael almost thought that he was going to apologize. He should’ve known better. “I didn’t know where else to go.”

  
Despite better judgment, Rafael stepped aside to allow his brother in. Frederick walked inside almost instantly, rubbing his fingers through his thick brown hair as he went. He looked distressed and worn down. Now Rafael was getting worried. 

  
“Hey,” he started, in the softest voice he could muster. He stepped closer. “Do you, uh, do you want coffee?”

  
Frederick’s arms were still wrapped around himself when he turned to his brother, shoulders slumped. He ignored his question and bit back his pride (something Rafael knew was almost impossible for him to do), and said, “I have no friends.” 

  
When Rafael only stared at him, Frederick shook his head dejectedly. “I shouldn’t have come. This is pathetic.” He started walking towards the door when Rafael blocked him, holding his shoulders squarely in his hands. 

  
“Freddie, come on now,” he said. “What happened?” 

  
From how close they were, Rafael could see the redness on his brother’s eyes, and the way his throat was constricting every once in a while. Frederick looked away from under his scrutinizing eyes and swallowed, before saying, “Well… you know the guy I was dating, right?”

  
Rafael’s hands fell to his side. Of course he knew Ian; the guy was in Harvard Med, like Frederick. Handsome, funny, but felt too unpredictable. Unstable. Still, the man was far better than all the brainless goons Frederick used to date. So he had tried to ignore the man’s flaws for his brother’s sake. 

  
“Ian. What about him?” 

  
“Um. Well. Our friends – I thought they were my friends – were hanging out at my dorm.” – Rafael has been to Frederick’s dorm once. It was clean and pristine and every bit of the life his brother so desperately wanted to have – “We were drinking. To celebrate Mandy’s birthday…” 

  
Rafael held his arm and directed his brother to the old sofa. When they sat, their knees are pressed together, Rafael’s hand firm on Frederick’s. 

  
“And they kept giving me shots. And I felt like nobody else was drinking like that, so instead of confronting them, I just lied down on my bed and tried to fall asleep.” Frederick sniffed, staring at anything but Rafael. “Mind you, I know how to handle my liquor.I was tipsy, but I was still rational. I blinked a few times and saw that Jason and Mandy were going through my desk, taking my papers and my hard work and shoving it in their backpacks. And Ian –“ 

  
When the two brothers’ eyes met, Rafael felt the pain in Frederick’s stare. “He was telling them to look at the bottom of my bed. ‘That’s where he keeps the draft of our final Psych paper,’ he said.” Rafael stroked his twin’s clenched fist with his thumb. “I don’t know why I let them do that. Why I didn’t stand up and confront them, or grab my things, or yelled, or _anything_.

  
“I just closed my eyes, tried not to cry, and waited until they left.” 

  
Rafael felt his chest tighten as he watched his brother retell that story. His hand flew to the other’s face, caressing his cheek as a single tear dropped from his eye. He could tell the man was trying to hold it all together. But with the pressure of his first year in Harvard Med, and his constant need for assurance and validation from others, it wasn’t shocking that his brother finally broke down. 

  
“Freddie, you don’t need them,” Rafael tried to say. “Look, I’ll accompany you to the Dean to tell them what happe–“

  
“Yeah, like I need the reputation of being a rat on top of being a total fucking _doormat_.” Frederick rolled his eyes; he looked so much like Rafael. “Thanks but no thanks, brother.” 

  
“Well, you have to do something.”

  
“No. I don’t.”

  
“Why not?”

  
“Forget it.” 

  
Rafael sighed. “They stole your things. Your work. And hell, you can prove it. Your dorm has security cameras, and I bet it caught them going out y–“

  
“ _Rafael, you’re not a lawyer,_ ” Frederick stressed, almost yelling. He bolted upright, waving his hands wildly. “I needed you to listen and you turn my misery into one of your law cases!” 

  
The older twin clenched his jaw, taken aback by the hostility. He just watched his brother with steady eyes, patience unfaltering. “You know what your problem is?” 

  
Frederick rolled his eyes. “Pray tell.”

  
“You were never comfortable in your own skin, Frederick.” Rafael stood up. His brother turned to him, mouth agape, but unable to say anything. Rafael decided to continue, before another outburst came. 

  
“You try to please everyone around you. That’s why you dated Ian in the first place,” he said. “You tried to be his perfect fit – handsome, smart, rich, sophisticated Frederick. Because you knew what associating with someone like Ian meant. It meant status, _power_.”

  
“Rafael, I am not interested in your psychoanalysis bullshit–“

  
“It’s why you insisted on getting a dorm inside campus, no matter how much you knew it cost, even with your scholarship,” Rafael continued. He watched Frederick squirm uncomfortably, grimacing. He took a step closer to his brother and placed a warm hand on his shoulder. “But you don’t need to do that, Freddie.”

  
“Is this the part where you list my good qualities to appeal to my ego?” There was an edge to his voice, but Rafael knew Frederick was teasing. 

  
“If it makes you feel better,” he smiled. “You’re smart, witty, ambitious, _sharp_. And you may not think this, but you’re good company.”

  
Frederick’s smile mimicked his own. “You’re saying that because you’re my twin brother,” he leaned in slightly, as if in conspiracy. “I’m you, Rafi.”

  
Rafael’s face broke out in a chuckle. Frederick did the same, walking closer and shoving his head on Rafael’s shoulder. He wrapped his arms around his twin brother, the both of them laughing like maniacs in the middle of the night. He bet they looked silly like that, but it didn’t matter. He hadn’t hugged his brother in so long that he totally torgot how Frederick felt.

  
When they broke apart, Frederick wiped the wetness on his cheeks with his fingers, still smiling brightly.   
Rafael asked, “Are you sure you don’t want to get back at them?”

  
He shook his head. “No,” he said, shrugging. “I’m smart, aren’t I? I’ll start writing a new paper – do something even _better_. I planned on replacing what I previously wrote anyway; its supporting arguments were weak and lacking.”

  
Rafael nodded, smiling. “Good. That’s good. The old Frederick is back.” 

  
Frederick tilted his head thoughtfully. “No. You’re talking to a new Frederick. Someone who… doesn’t have to please anyone in order to be happy.” 

  
“Oh, God,” Rafael feigned horror. “What have I done?” 

  
Frederick grinned brightly, a hand landing on his brother’s shoulder. He allowed himself to savor a few seconds of contact, before withdrawing his hand and shoving them down his pockets. “Brother, if you’ll have me, would you mind if I stayed the night?”

  
“Stay as long as you need,” Rafael said. “My bed is off-limits, though. They’re for my law books and study materials.” 

  
Frederick smirked. “Funny how my bed looked exactly the same way.” 

  
Rafael mimicked his twin’s sly grin. “Like you said,” he leaned in. “I’m you, Freddie.”


End file.
